New Year’s Resolutions
Definiteness of purpose is the starting point of all achievement. Clement Stone
Why is it that we wait and then once a year we choose the things we want to do, the things we want to change, and the activities in which we want to participate? Why is it that we wait all year to decide what is important, like planning a vacation rather than the rest of our lives? What kind of follow through can really happen on a spur of the moment decision?
When you discover your mission, you will feel its demand. It will fill you with enthusiasm and a burning desire to get to work on it. Clement Stone
To begin I would like to return to the vacation idea. For many, we spend much more time planning a vacation away than we do planning our lives. We carefully decide who we will travel with, where we will stay, what we will experience, the time of year, etc. and then we wait, with anticipation for that day to arrive. The rest of our lives usually falls into place more by accident than by intention.
Who do you spend time with? Are these the people you choose to have in your life or are they there by default? Do they make you feel good about yourself? Do they support your dreams and goals? Do you have fun while you are with them?
Be careful the environment you choose for it will shape you; be careful the friends you choose for you will become like them. Clement Stone
Where do you live? Is this your ideal location or do you live there by default? Are you there because of your partner? Do you live there because of your job? Do you live there because of your parents?
You are a product of your environment. So choose the environment that will best develop you toward your objective. Analyze your life in terms of its environment. Are the things around you helping you toward success – or are they holding you back? Clement Stone
If you were to go through every area of your life such as your career, the clothes you wear, your weight, the car you drive, etc. and really evaluate the happiness factor, would it measure up to the planning and satisfaction you get from a vacation?
In North America we have been conditioned to believe that we are in the pursuit of happiness. That happiness is a destination we must wait for, a reward we strive to reach after completing tasks and making achievements. It is like a “to do list” that keeps us forever feeling that our lives are just falling short of fulfillment and yet we have never really given much thought as to what that definition means to us.
New Year Resolutions support this belief. We live in a society that keeps us in an unhappiness mode. We have been taught, from a very early age, that we must chase happiness. That happiness is just beyond our reach and setting unrealistic goals only reinforces our belief that happiness is outside of our present reality.
When we direct our thoughts properly, we can control our emotions. Clement Stone
Resolutions are made at the end of the year, usually in a rushed manner, and many times under the influence of alcohol. Resolutions are usually based on ideas of what others think we should do rather than making a choice of what is important to us. As children we have been conditioned to follow the crowd, to fit in, and to accommodate other people’s expectations of what we should do or be invested in. Therefore the first step in setting a successful goal is to align it with our core values, interests, and passions.
Dan Sullivan refers to this as the gap which continues to make our life feel less than what we would like it to be. In other works the gap keeps our satisfaction level low and our unhappiness level high. If these goals are not intrinsically motivated they become meaningless. Chasing happiness creates dissatisfaction. Without a meaningful goal we will lack the motivation to follow through. Goals that are not written down are not real. Without action a goal is only a dream.
Here are a few tips to help you write a New Year Resolution that not only has meaning but staying power.
- Be clear on who you are, your likes, dislikes, motivators, passions, values, etc. by having a personality assessment
- Put as much time and thought into your New Year Resolution as you would in planning a vacation
- Be clear on where you want your life to go
- Repeat it daily and infuse this dream with a burning desire, emotion, and feeling
- Write it down supported with a plan of action. This does not mean you need to know the how of your goal, but you should at least have solid forward movement towards your goal. If you are heading in the wrong direction the universe will be sure to let you know (obstacles are a strong indication you are heading in the wrong direction)
- Begin with and maintain a positive mental attitude…use the law of substitution to replace, immediately, negative, self-limiting beliefs that could stop you from being successful
- Surround yourself with others who support you and your dreams. Master Minds partners do not have to understand or agree with your dreams, they only need to support you in achieving your goal
- And finally do not start something that you do not intent on following through with. To quote Lesson 4 line 12 from the Master Key System. “Unless you do this, you had better not start at all, because modern psychology tells us that when we start something and do not complete it, or make a resolution and do not keep it, we are forming the habit of failure; absolute, ignominious failure. If you do not intend to do a thing, do not start; if you do start, see it through even if the heavens fall; if you make up your mind to do something, do it; let nothing, no one, interfere; the “I” in you has determined, the thing is settled; the die is cast, there is no longer any argument.”
So this year when and if you set a resolution, plan it carefully. Choose who you will share your dream with. And most importantly if you do not plan to follow through it is a much better habit not to make a resolution than to teach your subconscious that follow through is not important. This belief can continue to sabotage your dreams for years to come.
No matter how carefully you plan your goals they will never be more than pipe dreams unless you pursue them with gusto. Clement Stone
For your 2016 personality assessment please email firstname.lastname@example.org