Part 1 of 3: Know Yourself
“When I discover who I am, I’ll be free.”
Ralph Ellison
As human beings we innately seek answers to the question, “Who Am I”. We are driven by an intrinsic need to learn and grow. We are programmed to be in service to others and we create a win-win when we are serving with our natural skills and abilities. Anything else feels like we are swimming upstream, fighting the current, and it can be exhausting.
Our pursuit to live our best life begins the day we are born and the restlessness we feel is our soul, our spirit, nudging us to be our true selves. For many of us it takes a crisis for us to notice our lives perhaps have veered off course.
Many of the obstacles we encounter in life are the result of the opinions and beliefs of others that we have unintentionally embraced as our own. Without a true understanding of ourselves, why we make the decisions we make, and without a realization we have a choice we can blindly exist in a life that feels meaningless, empty, and unfulfilling. This statement is void of social class, religious beliefs, income, lifestyle, or job status. We can have all the material possessions in the world and still feel our life lacks intention and purpose.
Why is this? It is because we are supporting the dreams of others while our dreams lie hidden from sight. It is because our values don’t align with the decisions we are making? It is because we have been led to believe chasing happiness will bring us satisfaction. It is because we have settled, without an awareness, that our lives could be different.
“Until you make peace with who you are, you’ll never be content with what you have.”
Doris Mortman
Successful people, the ones we look at that seem to have it all, understand the value in investing in themselves. They have taken the time, sought the support, and found the actions that allow them to feel satisfied even when life seems to have taken a turn for the worst.
They have completed an inventory of their values, likes and dislikes, their motivators and stressors, their skills and talents. They are aware of the types of environments they like to work within, the types of people they prefer to interact with, their learning style, how they speak to others, and how they prefer to be spoken to. Most importantly they accept and respect their strengths, fears, and limitations.
Successful people understand knowing themselves allows them to own their choices. It allows them to see themselves and their experiences as a reflection of their uniqueness. It empowers them to build on their strengths and to implement changes for improvement. Understanding and owning their individuality empowers them to take risks and prevents them from feeling like a victim.
They understand they need to align their choices with their values so their actions are in harmony with their authenticity. The benefits are endless as they do not seem to face the same struggles when it comes to making decisions. They make choices based on what is right for them rather than what others expect from them. They are able to identify and seize opportunities because they are able to see possibilities they may have missed without self-awareness. With a firm understanding of their personal definition of a meaningful existence they are able to maintain an inner peace and a calm in a storm. Overall living just takes less energy. It is easier to be human.
The relationship with yourself is one of the most important relationships in your life.
If you do not have a full understanding of who you are then how are others supposed to get to know you?”
Aristotle
Try this exercise. Put your pen in your dominant hand and write your name on a piece of paper. 
Now put the pen in your other hand and complete the same task.
Chances are when you were writing with your dominant hand you felt relaxed. It was familiar, easy, you could do it quickly without thinking about it. The results were favourable and in fact effortless.
The experience with your other hand, unless you are ambidextrous, was likely much different. It would have felt awkward, unfamiliar, difficult, time consuming, and while you completed the task the results were anything but stellar.
The skills and talents that come easily to you are usually discounted because you see them as unimportant. If you can do them, anybody can. Because you really don’t have a clear picture of who you are you push them aside and continue to search for your WOW. You most likely have been conditioned to believe others have the power to affect change that you overlook your very important contribution.
Life should be lived as if you are writing with your dominate hand. If it is easy it is your WOW! Imagine living your life as though you are writing with you dominant hand? Imagine living your life in the flow of what comes naturally. Innately?
It is your responsibility to discover, own, and use your amazing skills and talents because your life of purpose will not come looking for you. You must first know who you are, what you have to offer, and how you would like to offer it before you can begin to create a life that is rewarding. Without becoming intimately familiar with your likes, dislikes, motivators, stressor, learning style, talents, etc. you will continue to walk through your life with blinders on.
One of the places you can begin is to take a personality assessment. While this will not be the only step on your self-discovery journey this is a solid first step. When I first had my personality assessment done I felt like someone had been looking over my shoulder my entire life. There, in that room, I felt like it was okay to be me.
Today I have supported hundreds of individuals to identify their personality. They are then able to implement this knowledge into their daily lives and are able to articulate their needs to others. If you choose to have your personality assessed be sure to book a follow up coaching session to learn how to apply what you have learned effectively in your life.
I caution you not to just have your personality assessed but to take the time to become familiar with the words on the page. To really embrace and integrate the knowledge into your daily decision making process. Without building on the information gained you simply have completed a fun exercise empty of the direction you are seeking.
“The meaning of life is to find your gift. The purpose of life is to give it away.”
William Shakespeare
Watch for 3 Successful People Use to Leverage Personal Awareness to Live a Life of Purpose Part 2 of 3: Know Your Why.
Tammy Adams loves to problem solve, inspire and motivate others who are ready and committed to change. Tammy has spent over 30 years in the field of education and as a certified coach Tammy teaches individuals to challenge and conquer their limiting beliefs and insecurities to create the life of their choosing. As an Advanced Grief Recovery Method® Specialist Tammy understands that unresolved grief can limit an individual’s capacity for happiness and is gifted at supporting individuals through the pain and isolation cause by an emotional loss, of any kind, to a place of happiness they believed no longer existed. “Tammy helped me unpack the baggage and put a smile on my face in the process. It’s a rare quality for someone to fully listen without judgement but yet still steer you in the right direction.” She lives in Paris with her husband where she enjoys hiking, traveling, reading, and creating colourful mandalas. “The purpose of life is to discover your gift. The meaning of life is to give your gift away.”
www.tadams.ca